My Memory is Just Fine, Thank You

The Dreaded ScaleOf course I was distracted!

The Dreaded Scale
Of course I was distracted!

I should probably quit posting these stories about myself but I’m on a roll.

The other day I went to the gynecologist for my annual visit. This is something I dread, not so much because of the exam, but because it is one of the two times a year that I weigh. My weight was exactly what I thought it was. And hoped it wasn’t. So in my defense I was distracted, trying to figure out how to lose weight without actually giving up anything I like.

Anyway, this is how the conversation with the nurse went:

Nurse: When was your last period?
Me: I have no idea.
Nurse: Have you had one since you were here last December?
Me: I have no idea. Did I have one before then?
Nurse: Looks at me for a moment and makes a note.

Nurse: You have reached the age where we recommend a colonoscopy. Have you had one?
Me (proudly): Yes.
Nurse: What doctor?
Me: I have no idea.
Nurse: Where did you have it done?
Me (with absolute certainty): Here.
Nurse: (looking through the records): We have no record of it; are you sure?
Me: I am sure I had one.
Nurse: I’ll check the other clinic–yes, it was was with Dr. Moore. When did he tell you to return?
Me: I have no idea.
Nurse: Was it in 5 years?
Me: Really, I have no idea.
Nurse: Another look, another notation.

Nurse: I am afraid to ask the next question. Are you taking any medication other than Cymbalta?
Me (proud again): Yes!
Nurse: What are you taking?
Me: The one I can’t think of right now, but usually say when I am trying to remember Cymbalta.
Nurse: Another look.
Me: Well, it starts with a C, it has a lot of ads, it’s an anti-inflammatory and it sounds happy.
Nurse: Long pause with that look again. Do you mean Celebrex?
Me: Thats it!

At that point she hurried out of the room and didn’t come back!


By Lee Brennan on Thursday, January 24, 2013

Categories: Just Laugh Tags: ,

One Response to “My Memory is Just Fine, Thank YouComment RSS feed

  • Robert Nelson
    January 31st, 2013 11:32 am

    And she didn’t come back with a Security guard? LOL Good on you, most of that kind of info is or should be in there records, every bleeping time one goes to a doctor there sre the bleeping forms to fill out, even if it is the same dr..

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